Are Toxic People Secretly Holding You Back?

Have you ever walked away from a conversation feeling emotionally drained, unmotivated, or second-guessing yourself?

That’s not a coincidence.

Some people—Subtractors—feed off your energy without giving anything in return. They drain your motivation, inject negativity into your mindset, and make it harder for you to succeed.

The worst part? They don’t always look like enemies.

Subtractors can be friends, family, co-workers, or even mentors. They disguise their toxicity in subtle ways, keeping you stuck in a cycle of doubt, fear, and wasted potential.

If you’re serious about personal growth, transformation, and success, then identifying and eliminating these toxic relationships is non-negotiable.

How to Spot a Subtractor Before They Drain You Dry

Subtractors rarely show their true colors right away. Instead, they wear a mask of support while slowly undermining your confidence and progress.

Here are six warning signs that someone in your life is a Subtractor:

1️⃣ They Are Always Negative

Subtractors love to complain but never take action. If you share an exciting new goal or idea, they hit you with:
❌ “That’s too risky.”
❌ “Are you sure you can handle that?”
❌ “I wouldn’t get my hopes up if I were you.”

2️⃣ They Undermine You Subtly

Instead of openly discouraging you, they disguise their doubt in casual remarks:
❌ “Wow, you’re really doing that? Good luck.”
❌ “I mean, I support you, but let’s be realistic.”
❌ “You’re obsessed with this whole self-improvement thing.”

3️⃣ It’s Always About Them

Subtractors are takers. The relationship is one-sided—you listen, you support, you uplift… but when you need help? Suddenly, they’re unavailable.

4️⃣ They Drain Your Energy

After spending time with them, you feel:
🔻 Mentally exhausted
🔻 Unmotivated
🔻 Frustrated or confused

Real friends energize you. Subtractors leave you feeling empty.

5️⃣ They Always Make Excuses

Subtractors never take responsibility. They blame circumstances, people, or “bad luck” for their failures. Over time, their excuses start sounding like reasons.

6️⃣ They Resent Your Growth

Instead of cheering for you, they react negatively when you level up:
🔻 They make passive-aggressive comments.
🔻 They guilt-trip you for changing.
🔻 They try to pull you back into old habits.

🚨 BIGGEST RED FLAG: If someone makes you feel guilty for improving yourself, they’re a Subtractor.

How Subtractors Manipulate You into Staying in Their Circle

Once a Subtractor realizes you’re pulling away, they use manipulative tactics to keep you around:

🕸 Guilt-Tripping

“Wow, after all I’ve done for you, you’re just going to cut me off?”
“I guess success changed you.”

🕸 Playing the Victim

“You’re the only person who understands me.”
“If you leave, I have nobody.”

🕸 Fake Encouragement

“I support you, BUT… are you sure you can handle this?”

🕸 Love-Bombing

“I miss you! Let’s hang out like old times.”
“I’m so proud of you—I always believed in you.”
(Suddenly, they’re supportive… until they pull you back in.)

🕸 Using the Past Against You

“We’ve been through too much for you to just walk away.”

⚡ The Truth: Real supporters don’t use manipulation to keep you in their life.

Why Cutting Off Subtractors Might Be the Hardest Thing You Ever Do—But the Most Necessary

🚧 Why It’s Hard:

✔️ You might feel guilty for leaving them behind.
✔️ You may fear being alone or misunderstood.
✔️ Some Subtractors are family or childhood friends.
✔️ You’re worried about what they’ll say about you.

🚀 Why It’s Necessary:

✔️ Your energy is priceless—stop wasting it.
✔️ Subtractors block your blessings.
✔️ Your growth depends on it.
✔️ Your future is too big for small-minded people.

How to Cut Off Subtractors (Without the Drama)

💥 Step 1: Reduce Access – Stop answering every call. Create distance.
💥 Step 2: Stop Justifying Your Growth – You don’t need permission to evolve.
💥 Step 3: Set Boundaries – If they guilt-trip you, shut it down.
💥 Step 4: Replace Them with Supporters – Find people who uplift you.
💥 Step 5: Stick to Your Decision – No second chances.

🔥 Final Thought: Your Future is Too Big for Small-Minded People

You weren’t meant to stay stuck in toxic cycles.

Subtractors don’t just take your time; they take your potential.

💡 Choose growth.
💡 Choose purpose.
💡 Choose YOU.

The moment you cut out Subtractors, you free yourself to rise. 🚀

🔥 Now, It’s Your Turn:

✅ Have you ever dealt with a Subtractor?
✅ What was the hardest part about cutting them off?
✅ How did it change your life?

Drop your thoughts in the comments! Let’s talk. 👇🔥